I Saw....

This will just be a short little reminiscing post. 

Yesterday, we had a Chinese New Year Yee Sang Preview Dinner at Vistana. As we were getting the program list ready, I noticed there was a performance titled 'The Wong Sisters'.

I knew that my Sales Manager knew Lixian and her sisters, so I asked if it was them performing tonight. She said yes.

I was excited to see Jermaine and Jovian again. Lixian has already gone back to ICOM, so she wouldn't be there, but all the same, I was very much looking forward to seeing Jovian and Jermaine again.

It has been TOO LONG.

Of course, they didn't notice me when they first got on stage to perform. I was sitting somewhere in the middle of the hall, and the lights were dimmed so it's definitely hard to  recognise people from the stage.

But I couldn't NOT say hello; I didn't even know if I had a chance to meet them after the dinner, so I excused myself from the table and went to where they were beside the stage.

They were shocked to see me; probably they didn't expect to see me there.

The moment I saw them and their shocked faces, my mind immediately went back to Gino's studio. I was happy to see them, definitely, but at the same time, sad that the last I saw of them were at the old studio. So the memories tying me to them are of the old times at the studio.

They're both so tall and grown up now; when I left for uni, they were still small kids. SO MANY THINGS have changed since I left, and what I would do to turn back the time to when everything was as it was before.

It was nice meeting them. Although not long, I was happy seeing them for a few minutes.

Dance Moms Season 3, & Some other things...

So.. yeah.

Dance Moms Season 3 is here after what feels like forever.

I just finished watching the pre-show interviews (Smoke Before The Fire) and the first episode.

And as I'm watching new mom Shelly try to fit in with the Dance Moms (especially Christi),  I found myself leaning more towards Shelly's opinions rather than Christi.

And finally, I fully understood why Abby teaches the way she does.

Yes, I FINALLY figured it out after 2 1/2 seasons. ><

After constantly hearing Abby preach about good technique and performance quality and whatnot, and knowing how 'high standards' her dancers are due to her very demanding criteria, it hit me.

The reason she's so strict and always finds the kids' faults instead of praising them, is because she wants them to constantly improve themselves. I guess she thinks that if she praised them too much, it would get into their heads and make them think that maybe, "hey, Miss Abby praised me so I must've done pretty darn good," and if she praised them a lot, maybe they'd think they were already very good and wouldn't put much effort to correct themselves anymore.

So by constantly reprimanding them, she creates this desire and want for the kids to impress her; to gain her approval. And by craving her approval, they would have to push themselves harder and harder every time; thus constantly improving themselves along the way.

Yes, I finally got it.

And to be honest, I would act exactly like how Shelly did.

I mean, she's the new mom, and her daughter just got the lead role in the group number. When Christi asked Shelly to tell Abby that Ally won't dance if the 'angel' role became a solo, of course Shelly wouldn't do it. It's the time her daughter gets to shine and show Abby that Ally is worth it; how could she tell that to Abby?

And Shelly's right in a way; who is she to question the dance teacher? Of course you have to voice it out if the teacher crosses the line, but as of then, it's all good. And I mean, of course I can understand the other mom's dilemma as well, so.. I'm kinda torn with opinions, really. Hahaha. =p

But I just wish Christi would see it in Shelly's perspective though. Of course you could tell that to Abby if y'all have been together for so many years and are practically family, but Shelly is new and you can't expect her to give the same amount of loyalty to the other moms when she hardly know them! 

Which... brings me to my next, rather related topic, to be honest.

If you've been reading my blog, you'll know that in almost every post, there would be some declaration of how much dance means to me. I have never put much thought into it; ever since that fateful day years ago when Lika taught my group our double classes and showed us that ballet need not be all strict rules and CAN be fun.
And yes, you've probably read about that in a few of my previous entries, so you would know that dance is everything for me. I grew up on dance and while I'm VERY MUCH AWARE that my technique and 'size'; if you want to go there, isn't of 'ideal' proportion, especially for my age, it never really bothered me.

Don't get me wrong though, of course I try to take the corrections I've been given and apply them as much as I am able to.
But it never really bothered me that my dance skills are not up to par as others my age should, because here in the small town of Kuantan in Pahang (which, as of 2012, has the population of 366,229 people - Pahang, I mean), learning ballet itself is a rather unique thing, because there are only two ballet studios in Kuantan.

Up till about middle last year, when I started watching Dance Moms, that is.

Ever since I watched that reality show, it opened my eyes to just how talented kids are nowadays; and I'm talking about 13-year-olds and below. The standards have been notched up SO high now, that looking at the girls' dancing, when I was their age, I couldn't do a even a quarter of the tumbling they were doing.

Partly, I guess, due to the fact that I have never danced professionally; it has always been leisurely, also due to financial issues amongst others.

Dancers nowadays, if they want to dance professionally, REQUIRE tumbling and technique classes. I never had any of those.

Dancers who want to dance professionally take at least 5 classes per week, each ranging from 2-3 hours per class, sometimes more. I take 2 classes per week; 3 at most, 2 hours max.

So the more I reality hit me at how far behind I am compared to others HALF my age (of course I knew I was nowhere near as good at them, but this was kinda a slap to my face), the more I ranted about how I wish I could take more classes; how I envied kids whose parents fully support their dance both emotionally and financially, and how I wish I had the chance and had the money to do so.

I was also very aware that the other girls who had been grades below me are in fact, overtaking me now because they were able to afford going to courses and still take classes.

It sucks knowing how much I want to take those courses and continue taking classes as well,but can't due to financial restraints, but I tried not to let that bother me although, very obviously, it did.

Still, though, I made dancing a part of my life wherever I could. I started teaching adults, though it were VERY few.

So I was utterly flabbergasted when my passion was questioned. My first, initial reaction was a blow up. I was close to exploding. Because I thought it was well known the reason why my participation is not as active as the rest. 
But I did not blow up. I bit my tongue and explained.

After that, I myself began to question my passion. I mean I thought I was an okay dancer. Not brilliant, not great, but at least I qualified as a dancer. 

But that statement made me think. Was I really even as 'okay' as I thought I was? Was dancing even suitable for me? (Yes, hearing that now, I want to slap myself.) 
I even had the scariest thought a dancer could have: should I just stop dancing all together?

I started imagining my life without dance in it. I thought of all the weekends I'd be spending at home, doing nothing. Of all the dance shows I'd watch, and started imagining that if I really stopped dancing, how I would react to that.

And something snapped.

I came across the music video of The Script & Will.I.Am's song, Hall of Fame.

Sure, I've heard that song a few times, but when I watched the music video and paid attention to the lyrics, I understood.

My brain literally slapped itself.

"Are you fucking kidding me??" It literally said.




I watched the video; and cried.

Part of me was disappointed in myself; how could I even let such a thought infest my mind?

Stop dancing completely? Was I crazy??

And then I realised: I was just going through what the deaf ballerina in the video is going through. Whispers and rolled-eyes, snickers and sneers. If I give up now I'm definitely going to regret it later.

Moral of the story is, I know I'm still not dancing professionally (DUH). I know I'm probably no where near (farther now, in fact/to be honest) being able to do the kind of acrobatic stunts that are required of a serious dancer.

But I also know that I happen to be teaching. Whether it is just 1 student or 100, I'm still teaching. And that already gives me a chance to dance. Sure, I would LOVE to do other genres of dance. It's DEFINITELY on my list. 

But I know that for a good few years probably, I wouldn't be able to due to my financial crisis. I am also aware that I'm not young anymore, and that the chance of a professional dance career are already out of reach.

But I'm not giving up hope.

Anything can happen within the next few years, so while I've accepted that my performances on stage have been limited, at the same time, I'm hopeful.

As long as I can walk, I will incorporate some form of dance in my life. I will never let anyone question what I love again; because like I mentioned before, I don't care if others take no notice of my efforts or fail to see it. As long as I know that I have put in effort. I won't let others determine if I've put in effort or not, because at the end of the day, I know, and God knows.

Just A Little Update...

If you don't already know... We're having a concert this Sunday, 16th December 2012.

It will be our first concert without Mr Gino, and I can tell you, things couldn't be more different.

What do I mean by 'different' exactly?

In every sense, really. So very different.

But I shall not dwell on that, because if I do and I get carried away, this entire post will be about why it's so different.
And I do not want to do that, because there is this... emotion in me, if you will, that is not very stable at the moment, and I'm afraid that if I don't control it, I might burst out and cause a ruckus.

So yeah.

Another thing related to what I'm about to post would be this: The fact that whatever left of the younger students who have also grown up with Gino; as in those who had been taught by Gino since they were in Pre-Primary up to his death, is probably the only thing I have left; whatever little 'grasp' I have of the old times, basically.

For me it just creates a kind of 'bond', if you can call it that, between me and the students because they know Gino and have been under his teachings as well, so they'd know and understand what I mean when I mention something about the old times.

They are also the only people who have not changed since the good old times... in a good way.


If you have been reading my blog or know me, you'd know that I have a solo this upcoming concert. Unfortunately it's merely a simple choreography, because I didn't have the time to choreograph a proper one due to my other inclinations. 

That, and I admit that I'm horrible at choreographing. 

So naturally, I get a bit self-conscious when I dance it out in front of everyone during rehearsals. And it wasn't until about 2-3 weeks ago that I 'finished' my choreography.

Thankfully though, by the time it's my turn to dance, not too many people are watching because they'd either be busy getting ready for their numbers or doing some other stuff.

And since then, every time I finished my number, there are these 3 kids who never fail to clap for me: Michelle, Irene, and Loi Eean. And sometimes, the Intermediate Foundation girls as well.

What's the big deal, you ask?

There were no claps for the other dances. Not unless one of the 'teachers' asked them to clap.

They would grin the kind of grin that let you know they truly liked it, and clap the moment I took my bow.

It's nothing much, but little kind gestures and acts like these really get me because I'm a big ol' sappy woman. When they clap, I smile at them, hoping they'd get the message that I was thankful for them being supportive of me.

It means a lot when someone is sincerely supportive of me or appreciates me, regardless of age. I've always yearned to be more than just 'a teacher' (if you really COUNT me as a teacher, that is *eyeroll*). I want to be someone they look up to; not just in dance.


So when they clap for me... Although I know that the standard of my dancing is really low compared to others my grade, but as they grin at me as they clap, I'm kinda hoping that in a way, I'll inspire them. If not in dance, then in one way or another.

So if you ever happen to come across my blog: Irene, Loi Eean and Michelle... Thank you.

It may not mean much to you, but know that your little gesture means something to me. Even more so at this time when there's something internal going on for me. You know not of it; and I'd like to keep it that way for now, so just.. thank you.

I love you girls!

*insert expression of utmost belief here*

Wow. I'm speechless.

And for the first time (not in my life, but where my passion is concerned), it's not a good kind of speechless.

I feel like I've been betrayed constantly time and time again that I'm surprised I still get so surprised by it.

I really want to keep doing it, but it's hard when what you do is not even acknowledged, and you're treated so differently.

I do ONE thing that apparently stands in the way of me being actively involved, and I get isolated like this. When I DO participate actively and pour my time and blood and sweat into it, it gets overlooked and I still don't get recognition for my contributions.

Well I'm sorry I don't have enough money like the rest to continue my classes. I'm sorry I can't afford to go for courses and extra classes to 'better myself' up. Tch, if I HAD the money, you wouldn't even have to ask; the moment there's an opportunity, I'd grab it before you can even invite me.

It's VERY hard, I must say. When you're trying your best to get involved any way you can, but no one is taking you seriously, and they're instead treating you like you yourself had opted out.

NO.

The circumstances forced me to add another commitment into my life, in which you were the one who suggested in the first place.

I wanted to focus solely on what I love; it's the MAIN reason I stopped uni in the first place. But because it couldn't support me and my dad has been constantly on my case to get a 'better, well paying job', I was forced to put my commitments someplace else.

This situation is making me dread practises. But I know that I still LOVE my passion... if possible, even more so. It is the SITUATION that makes me dread it.


Also, what happened to all those talks from before in which you apparently 'stroked my ego' and compared me with the other? Where was the truth you told me passion-wise? Because I sure as hell ain't seeing it now.


I'm not sad, I'm not angry. I'm FUCKING DISAPPOINTED.

And you of all people KNOW that I hate people beating around the bush; if there is something that you're not happy with, fucking TELL ME.

Please.


우리는 그렇게 가까이하는 데 사용하지만, 그 날 후에 내가 녹음 시간을 착각하면 일이 예전의 상태로 돌아갈 수 없지 있습니다. 미안 해요, 심지어 내 결백을 보여 주겠다고하지만 이후 매우 다르게 나 치료를했습니다.

이 모든이 끝난 후 내 말 명심하게, 난 당신을 앉아이 이상 수행을 함께 얻을거야. 난 병이 모든 치료 빌어 먹게 피곤해. 이 유적의 관계를한다면, 그럴 수. 적어도 나는 정직이고 실제로 문제의 하단에 가져 오기를 원했습니다.

I Just LOVE Dance Movies. Don't You? n_n

Don't you just love it when something just makes you smile;

Maybe even shed a tear or two...

Knowing that you did the right thing...

And have absolutely no regrets? ^^

I just watched Step Up Revolution last night and found one main thing ironic:

First, that the lead characters' story is somewhat similar to mine; with, of course, some big exceptions. Emily's dad doesn't believe that dance is a wise 'career'; meaning that he doesn't think dance will pay the bills. My dad and grandparents think that too. Sean's sister, whom he's living with, encourages him to get a 'proper job' because 'dancing isn't a job'. And yes, my dad and grandparents think that too.

So naturally, when Emily had that conversation with her dad, it hit home. Thank God for those 3D glasses because I shed some tears at that part. And I don't think my boyfie noticed, so thank goodness. xD

The main difference is, however, that as 'unheard of' as The Mob may be, they are DEFINITELY about a gazillion times better than I am at dancing, and it makes me kinda sad to know that there isn't anything CLOSE to the Mob where I live.

But also, it made me realise and think.

I shouldn't let the lack of opportunities stop me from doing what I love to do. If I can't afford to pay for lessons to learn, then I shall learn them on my own.

There are many 'How-To' videos on YouTube, and although it may not be the best way to learn it, it's most definitely better than nothing.

Another part I got a little teary at was the Art Gallery scene, I think. The dances were GORGEOUS. Of course, extra points that there was a beautiful Ballet scene too!

It's not the best quality, I know, but just wait till there's a HD version. And no, it's not my recording.

The other irony is this: 

I'm not known for my tears.
That is to say, I very rarely show my tears to people.
And even when a touching or sad scene comes on, I hold it in and don't cry because I'm probably watching it with my family or friends.

But when I watched this, I cried TWICE. My eyes just welled up and the tears fell before I could blink them away.

Even in Ballet class YEARS ago, I was known as one of the 'tough ones' to not cry whenever Gino yelled at me. But just a simple scene from a dance movie could trigger all that emotion. 

Well would you look at that.


So to end this, the movie also made me realise... that I may not be anywhere near the kind of dancing I'd like to be doing, but it's a start. It's better than not dancing at all.

I have no regrets leaving uni at all. 

Here are some scenes from the new movie.

*insert bitter sigh here*

Hello.

It's been a very long while, I know.

And honestly, this post isn't gonna be a very cheery one either.


In a way, I guess it's good to know that... whenever I seem to be a little preoccupied in something else other than dance, something will happen that will remind me just how much I can't live without it.

It's as if every time I get  sidetracked, someone up there (Gino, maybe?) will make something happen to make me realise WHY I'm doing what I am. WHY I'm sticking around. WHY I have to take another job for me to realise it.

Recently, I got a job offer at Vistana. Which is all good, but should I take it, I would have to stop teaching Ballet. And I guess you could say that I freaked out.

Silently, that is.

I managed to live without ballet for two years in Uni, but that was because there were other dances there that I could take to fill up the void space in me.

If you've read my other blog entries at any time, you will know how I always gush about dancing in general; not just ballet. The main reason that that's the only thing I rant about is because that's the only genre of dance that I know of. 

Sadly.

So you can imagine how I feel when my friends are able to go for dance/ballet shows, performances, and courses, when I have to stay back, pretend it doesn't bother me as much as it does, and smile.

Do you have any idea how much it hurts that I can't go? How much it hurts when I hear my friends talking about what and how much they've learnt, and I have no clue whatsoever? Worse, that I can't even take classes to learn them, and have to rely on what I've learnt throughout my years with Gino - which although is VERY useful in most areas, lacks in some as well because he was never detailed?

Like now, regarding the new RAD syllabuses for Grades 1-3.

I only vaguely know it from the DVD I've watched. And like Lika has said numerous times, the videos can only be used for reference. So I hardly know the new syllabus. I only know the old one, having, of course, danced it myself.

There was a course recently in Singapore for these new grades. To teach the correct methods and steps of the dance.

And of course, I couldn't go.

It was too expensive for me. 

So I still have no clue about the proper way of how it's done.

Yes, I could be spending most of my free time in the studio, observing and learning. But there's only so much I can let Lika do for me without feeling like I'm somewhat 'cheating'.. that I'm expecting her to teach me all this, for free.

So I'm back to square one.

All because I can't afford it.

Don't be mistaken; I'm not being unthankful here. I'm very much aware that I was able to go to the Vaganova workshop in November last year, and the very recent International Ballet Gala.

But that's just it. I have to fork out my own money to go to these events (bear in mind that there's also the travel expenses and the food money), and I've already used up so much.

True, I'm working now and even before I took up my recent receptionist job, but let's be honest here: the money I was making teaching ballet was barely able to cover up any expense whatsoever (because I was not doing it full time, and lack experience). If it was, I wouldn't have even considered taking another job. Teaching ballet alone was enough to make me happy.

And just when I was contemplating on whether I should stop teaching ballet for the time being and focus on my job as a receptionist, I saw Ice dancing today.

If anyone I know from the studio happens to read this, I'll confess this to you now: my heart hitched at my throat when I saw her dancing to Christina Perri's A Thousand Years, and I can honestly say that I knew, by watching her dance, that if I were to see her dance for real during the wedding performance, I'd cry.

I love performing, and I love dancing. But I am also VERY aware that I'm no Alina Somova or Maria Kochetkova. Heck, I'm not even close to Miko Fogarty.

They say that in dance, it doesn't matter how good you are; you just have to have the passion and the drive.

But what if you do; what IF, you just can't get enough 'sources' to help you improve?

Sure, I could buy a bunch of DVDs and books and stuff and learn from them. But with no one to correct me, how would I know that what I'm doing is not a wrong technique or something? I mean sure, it's ok if you just want to learn for fun. But to learn something wrongly; to learn the improper method, it would only be harder to correct in the future.

And I don't want that.

Inspirational Songs

Ok ok, I know I haven't updated in a LOOOONNNGGG while... I even haven't typed up my Ballet Gala post, and to be very honest, I'm not sure that I'm even going to. ><


No, I haven't lost interest in blogging.. but hey, maybe I WILL post about it after all. We'll see.
What I don't get, however, is how this blog gets more views than my main blog, and I rarely update this one.. O.o


But anyways. This post will just be a cross-post from my main blog, because it involves dance as well. ^^ So click here to read it.^^


Oh, and comment, too? Pretty please?

Gentle Reminders...

Just yesterday, I got a little glued to YouTube channel ittiebittiedancer.
Kaylee is probably about 7 years old now, but she started taking Ballet, Tap, Jazz, Lyrical, and Rhythmic Gymnastics when she was about 4-5 years old. And GOD is she GOOD.


Apparently she trains under the Classical Russian Ballet, which would explain her incredibly good technique (AT AGE 5, MAY I REMIND YOU), something I'd ashamedly admit is even better than mine. But then again, my technique isn't much to shout about, is there?

 

 Heck, she's FIVE and already she's learning Chaines and Poses and Pirouettes?? And to think... what I was doing at five years old... *cries*


And then in gymnastics, at 5 years old she is already in level 4. Now, I know close to nothing about how the gymnastic grades/levels go, but apparently Kaylee had started gymnastics either right after she turned 5, or 9 months before she was 5. Either way, for her to be able to go from Level 1 to Level 4 within 9 months... Well, that's hecka good.

I read a comment that said she's awesome in gym and all, but she has the body/techniques of a ballerina through and through. Honestly, if that was me I'd HARDLY complain. It would be a compliment to have a body of ANY kind of dancer!


Me, on the other hand... I have a body of a God.


..........
.........
........
.......
......
.....
....
...
..
.

BUDDHA.

*I don't mean to insult or anything, in case you didn't know or haven't already guessed. It's all meant in good humour. It means I'm fat. 




Jokes and admiration aside, however, I've posted this to prove a point about something as well.


If a FIVE YEAR OLD is able to attain that level in such a short period of time, who are we to give excuses that ' we can't ' ?


Sure, some people may be born with the talent or the body type (but some of whom who has these attributes and NOT like dancing... yes, I know. It irritates me too. ), and some of us (yours truly included) have to work our asses off almost THRICE as hard to obtain HALF the result of people like Kaylee.


Still, I'm saying that NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE, and that everything CAN be possible if you keep working hard and putting your heart in it. Nothing can be done properly if you don't have the heart for it.
Or the talent, for that matter.


Sure, we may not be as good as we HOPE to be (what with each of us having different levels of what we think to be 'good enough' ), but it's workable. 


Look at the video below, and TELL me you don't get inspired watching it. 

This girl has Down's Syndrome, but look at how she dances. And notice the applause she got at the end of her performance. It's because although I'm sure she knew she made some mistakes here and there, she never let it get to her and continued smiling and dancing with all her heart. And just by looking at her dance, you can tell that she absolutely LOVES what she's doing.


I've seen this video before, but no matter how many times I do, every time I see it, it brings a smile to my face and brightens up my day.


I'll end this post here, but leave you with this thought in mind: If someone who has Down's Syndrome can go out there in public, not a hint of fear in her eyes at what some may think, and dance like it's all she ever wants to do, why can't WE do the same?

It's Been A While...

A VERY long while. =p

So.. just a short recap of what has been going on before I get to the point of my post:

1. I have been teaching Adult Ballet for the 2nd month now, and we're slowly getting more students.

2. Teaching at the kindergarten has not been much of a difference since I first started; only that the kids have warmed up to me completely. ^^

*clears throat*

Ok.

If there's one thing I've realised, it's that I LOVE Jin's videos. They are either really just plain ironic and funny, or funny, with a deep meaning to it.


In fact, his latest video, 'Class Clown', made me cry. It's basically about a new teacher, Alex, who used 'theatrical' methods to teach History to his students, and whom, quite predictably, was opposed to by the headmaster. Only to find out later that Alex's method had indeed worked, and the students scored high marks for the 'pop quiz'. 


What really got to me was the sad fact that VERY RARELY would a teacher go to those lengths to teach their students. Most teachers are all about academic achievement these days, and being all strict and stern to get their students to 'study harder' and achieve 'better grades'. 


Call me dense, but these stern methods don't flow with me. The harsher/ more fierce you are with me,  the higher chance I will rebel and basically not give a SHIT about the teacher and what he/she is teaching. And, they will probably be in my bad books.
FOREVER.


Watching Jin's video made me think back to my lecturers/teachers who have actually made a lasting impact in my life. I can name and count them on the fingers of my ONE hand: Mr Lionel Keith, Ms Azleen, Mr Afi Roshezry and Mr Gino.


MR GINO.


That was probably what started my tears.


My Ballet teacher was probably the only teacher who was SO strict and stern (to the point he had sent NUMEROUS sobbing kids out of class, and some that had been so afraid of him that they'd skip class - yours truly included. xD ), and yet... I was thankful for him. SO VERY THANKFUL.


He grew closer to Lika and I as we got older, and he literally became my second father. 


He sung to the musics in class, and spoke 'Thai' to us (but which was literally just gibberish), and shared his experiences and jokes with us.


Of course, all this wouldn't have been so bad if he had still been around.


He passed away in 2010; when I was in my first year and first semester of university. And what killed me so bad was that I never had the chance to say goodbye, or tell him how much he meant to me.


And he was one of that teachers who left a HUGE impact on my life.


Teachers like these are so rare nowadays. And it's sad that 'over-achievers' think that these rare bunch are ridiculous idiots.


Because they are NOT.


In fact, they'd make better teachers than you fierce-stern lot EVER would.


MR GINO, I STILL MISS YOU.
And you still can make me cry.

Yikes, and Wow and the same time.

OK, so I'm a little iffed because I typed this post out using Chrome, and when I posted it, NOTHING except the title and tags came out. Grrrr.

And now I feel lazy to type it all over again. =.="

Anyways, I was musing how much I sucked at updating my dance blog, despite constantly professing my love for it.

And my flexibility.

Or rather, lack thereof. T_T

I used to do yoga for quite a few months back then, and I noticed that it DID help with my flexibility, but then I stopped yoga, and then I stopped ballet for a good 2 years because of uni.

And my flexibility just FLOPPED.

Like, literally. Bunny ears flop.

Ok, so I'm trying to make my 'disability' sound cute for a moment there.

Sorry. >.<

Not that I was all bendy last time either, so....

But you get my point.

And then there's me teaching.

I officially start this week, and I'm a little ball of excitement (and a little nervous... wreck.)

P/S: cute fail again there...

Before this I had been just a 'stand-in', per say. This time, I'll be handling 2 kinds of people by myself: adults, and  kindergarteners.

The best part of all these, though?

I FINALLY get to do what I love.

I'll make you proud, Mr Gino. <3